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 Steel Release: Steel Coffin

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Kinzoku
Jounin of Konoha
Jounin of Konoha
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Fame : 20
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Earth, Fire, Wind, Steel
Clan : Nazar
Clan Element : Steel
Bloodline : Arahant
Ryo : 2850
100%


PostSubject: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Sun Aug 05, 2018 8:12 pm

NameSteel Release: Steel Coffin
ElementSteel
RankS
Spec TypeNinjutsu
BackstoryAt the realization that he had no truly powerfully offensive jutsu, Kinzoku began developing a technique just for that. Being the long ranged fighter that he is he wanted to develop a technique that was both very difficult to evade and once activated, nearly impossible to escape from. That way the actual attack from the juts would be nearly unavoidable. It couldn't be a jutsu that people would see coming very easily from the distance he liked to keep. So he developed a jutsu where it's point of creation was literally around the target and once activated it trapped them within the jutsu. That way there was no way of escaping the actual offensive power of the jutsu.

AppearanceSteel sphere measuring 20ft in diameter at most, with a reflective surface on the outside. 
Spoiler:
 

HandsealsRam - Boar - Snake - Tiger or None (Explained Below)
Duration6 posts
CooldownPosts used + 2.
Range: 30 meters.
PowerChakra stat.
SpeedChakra stat.
HealthChakra stat.
Stat BoostsN/A
What it doesSteel Coffin surrounds anything in a ball of steel at jutsu speed that can range anywhere from up to 20ft in diameter. The target must be within jutsu range. The steel from the jutsu begins forming all around its target. This occurs with many small pellets of steel forming around the user. Each point of steel begins spreading around the user as they come together and form up with one another. This process forms the full sphere at jutsu speed. What the user chooses to surround in the Steel Coffin is entirely up to them. If the user decides to create the jutsu around someone a target  that is larger than the jutsu, the sphere will create sufficient holes instead of cutting right through the object or person (EX: If used on a 30ft tree, then 20ft will be inside the sphere while the remaining 10 will be coming out of a hole created by the jutsu). The hole itself is sealed tight to whatever may be sticking out, not even leaving room for air to get in or out. 
 
On Command, the user can cause the sphere to begin shrinking to as small as need be, crushing whoever or whatever is inside. This occurs at jutsu speed with power equal to the jutsu's power. If whatever is inside has health less than the power of the jutsu, they/it will be crushed. 
If the opponent inside the sphere has health equal to the power of the jutsu they can resist being crushed. If they have strength greater than the health of the jutsu +20, they can break free of the sphere.
For every post inside the sphere after it has began shrinking (post 2 of being inside once shrinking begins), whatever is inside the sphere will have their strength reduced by 70. This occurs in the case of a "stalemate", where the jutsu's power is lower than the opponents health but the opponents strength is lower than the jutsu's health and thus cannot break free. In this case they get exhausted from resisting the shrinking sphere and will experience the debuff.
If an opponent manages to resist the shrinking sphere for the duration of the jutsu, by the 6th post they will simply pass out due to running out of breathable air.
Explained:
 

This jutsu only allows the user to alter the size of the sphere by shrinking and increasing the size of the Steel Sphere (within jutsu parameters). The user cannot move the Steel Sphere around. Once created the Steel Sphere remains stationary or attached to the target it is created around (example of tree).
 
This jutsu can be used with no hand seals if it is used in conjunction with Steel Release: It's Raining Metal. Since the steel rain from the jutsu already contains Kinzoku's chakra inside of it, he does not need to perform the set of seals for Steel Coffin in order to gather his chakra into the jutsu. His chakra has already been gathered into the steel rain. However for this to work, It's Raining Metal has to have been activated for a minimum of 4 posts. Any less and Kinzoku will still have to perform the hand seals due to the jutsu not having gather enough chakra yet.To perform the jutsu with no hand seals will cost an additional 50ap atop the 100ap to activate Steel Coffin. If the jutsu is mastered, the additional 50ap no longer applies when performing it with no hand seals (if the chosen mastered version is with no hand seals).

Character SpecificKinzoku Nazar, those he teaches.
Wordcount to Learn8,000.
Action Cost100ap, 50ap per post.
MasteryYes.
Bonus RequirementsBe a Nazar or have obtained Steel Release. Steel Release: It's Raining Metal (to use no hand seals ability)
Canon or CustomCustom.


Last edited by Kinzoku on Sun Aug 12, 2018 2:30 pm; edited 5 times in total
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Kinzoku
Jounin of Konoha
Jounin of Konoha
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Fame : 20
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Earth, Fire, Wind, Steel
Clan : Nazar
Clan Element : Steel
Bloodline : Arahant
Ryo : 2850
100%


PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Wed Aug 08, 2018 8:37 am

bump
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Kōmori Hozuki
Raikage
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Fame : 103
Home Village :
  • Cloud

Element(s) : Make
Clan : Kumo
Clan Element : Great
Bloodline : Again
Ryo : 0
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PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Wed Aug 08, 2018 4:56 pm

Howdy.

Not gonna lie, I'm not a huge fan of jutsu with two resist stats, so help me clarify somethin'.
-Health < Jutsu Power = crushed
-Health = Jutsu Power = stuck
-Strength +20 > Jutsu Power = breakout
Sound right?

"For every post inside the sphere after it has began shrinking (post 2 of being inside once shrinking begins), whatever is inside the sphere will have their health and strength reduced by an amount equal to jutsu power."
I don't feel comfortable with a stacking debuff equal to chakra stat. I'd be okay with -70 to both health and strength, but it just seems like overkill otherwise.

In the second paragraph you state that it can go 'as small as need be', but in the 3rd, it can only go down within jutsu parameters. So can you make this encase a person entirely or just remain a 5ft sphere at minimum?

Specify that the user has to state how large the breathing holes are the post in which they're made. Otherwise you/others taught might forget and be vagued into oblivion.

Based on the 4 post duration of a tech prior to it, I think I'm okay with that last paragraph.

First glance is finished, bump when you're ready



Give me honorable enemies rather than ambitious ones, and I'll sleep more easily by night.
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Kinzoku
Jounin of Konoha
Jounin of Konoha
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Fame : 20
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Earth, Fire, Wind, Steel
Clan : Nazar
Clan Element : Steel
Bloodline : Arahant
Ryo : 2850
100%


PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Wed Aug 08, 2018 9:23 pm

Sounds about right. Let me know how you'd like to go about that. Perhaps just health? Then how would we allow people to get out? The way I saw it was the strength wasn't really a resist stat. It was more so just stating how people can break out based on the rules. Whether I put that in or not, it would essentially be the same, i think.

Reduced debuff to 70. I had it as chakra-stat to see how far I could push the envelope, but I had a feeling it was too much.

I got rid of the minimum of 5ft so help clarify. It was pretty confusing. So yes, it can encapsulate and entire person with the max diameter being 20ft. Now there's no minimum diameter.

I got rid of the breathing holes entirely. The point was to use it in conjunction with another jutsu idea I had but I changed my mind. Makes things more simple.
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Kōmori Hozuki
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PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:01 pm

Fair enough. The first time I read it, it sounded strange to me, but I reread a few times and left that there as my initial draft.

Thank ya.

I'm fine with that, a full mod might rule otherwise, etc, etc.

Nice.

Third paragraph. Take away the "manipulate as they please" and just leave the shape alteration bit in there.



Give me honorable enemies rather than ambitious ones, and I'll sleep more easily by night.
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Kinzoku
Jounin of Konoha
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Fame : 20
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Earth, Fire, Wind, Steel
Clan : Nazar
Clan Element : Steel
Bloodline : Arahant
Ryo : 2850
100%


PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:09 pm

Made the edits.
I also included your brief explanation into a spoiler since it's actually quite helpful and clear n_n
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Kōmori Hozuki
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Clan : Kumo
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Bloodline : Again
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PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Thu Aug 09, 2018 12:13 am

Works for me lol. Trial Approved.



Give me honorable enemies rather than ambitious ones, and I'll sleep more easily by night.
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Kinzoku
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Fame : 20
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Earth, Fire, Wind, Steel
Clan : Nazar
Clan Element : Steel
Bloodline : Arahant
Ryo : 2850
100%


PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Fri Aug 10, 2018 5:38 pm

Bumping for approval

Since Komori isn't cool enough for that
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Kōmori Hozuki
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Clan : Kumo
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Bloodline : Again
Ryo : 0
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PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Sat Aug 11, 2018 11:23 am

Revoking my trial approval



Give me honorable enemies rather than ambitious ones, and I'll sleep more easily by night.
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Gary
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PostSubject: Re: Steel Release: Steel Coffin   Sat Aug 11, 2018 11:51 am

Let's get down to it, shall we?

Formation: We'll need to go a bit more in depth about how this whole thing works or rather what it looks like. Does the sphere just appear around people? Do pellets of metal gravitate towards the point chosen by the user? I'm not sure; only you, the creator of the jutsu, know for sure. Please make it so those you rp with can easily understand the what the formation process looks like.

Debuff: let's make this debuff just strength and not health/strength. It shouldn't hurt the effectiveness of the jutsu all that much and it will prevent it from being an instakill upon shrinking.

Hand Seals: So, is the only way for this jutsu to become hand sealless through use of the steel rain jutsu? Or can mastery still be attained via training like anything else?

That's all I've got for the moment. Please bump this thread when you are ready for round two.


"Battle not with Monsters lest ye Become a Monster and if you gaze into the abyss the abyss gazes also into you"
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