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 Bolt

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AuthorMessage
Nobunaga
STORM
STORM
avatar

Fame : 7
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Lightning, Wind, Earth
Clan : Hiyu
Bloodline : Tai no Hengen
Ryo : 6750
100%


PostSubject: Bolt   Sat Aug 12, 2017 1:36 am

NameBolt
ElementLightning
RankS
Spec TypeNinjutsu
BackstoryNobunaga was never the fastest shinobi and as a shinobi who preferred close range, hand to hand and weaponry styled combat, his lack of speed was not ideal. Especially when fighting shinobi that specialised in Genjutsu and the use of long ranged ninjutsu, he often found himself at a disadvantage. Jutsus like body flicker just wouldnt cut it and even with the use of speed enhancement jutsus, others who were already faster had speed enhancement jutsus of their own as well. Thus Nobunaga created this powerful technique, a technique that would allow him to travel amazingly fast to swiftly close the gap between him and his enemies.

Appearance

Spoiler:
 

 
HandsealsSnake - Monkey - Boar - Tiger
Duration1 Post
Cooldown2 Post
Range50
Power-
SpeedRT
Health-
What it does Nobunaga funnels lightning chakra into every cell of both his entire body and everything he is in contact with. Absorbing the lightning chakra into his body Nobunaga super charges his cells and the cells of the things he's in contact with with, essentially turning them into lighting. Once this state is achieved, he can shoot himself as a lighting bolt to swiftly transport himself. This allows him to transport himself to anything he can see within a 50 meter radius of his current position at a speed of his reaction time.

Nobunaga cannot transport himself through or into objects with this nor can he transport himself into or onto people. During the transportation he cannot come into contact with someone else. The closest he can get to an object or person before returning to his normal state is 1 meter. Only once transportation is completed and he has fully appeared can he make contact with another individual.

Because Nobunaga is moving as a lightning bolt, he is still physically there with the same health, chakra, strength etc, just moving faster and in the form of lighting thus he can still be hit. Therefore if something were to come into contact with the lightning bolt it would be coming into contact with him. If Nobunaga is hit with something he would have to make the same health check to see if he resists the attack as normal. If the attack's power/strength is higher than his health he is hit out of the lighting bolt form. If his health is greater than or equal to the power of the attack than he can resist it and continue on his path as a lighting bolt.

While transporting himself as a lighting bolt, Nobunaga will arrive at his destination in the exact same position he left. Therefore he cannot move his body or perform any actions while the transportation is occurring. However once he arrives at his destination anything he was doing before hand will continue. For example, if he was starting a front kick, then transported, upon arrival the same force, movement, inertia, kinetic energy etc that his kick would have had if he had never transported himself would be applied after the transportation is completed.

Character SpecificNobunaga and those he teaches
Wordcount: 8000
Action Cost60
MasteryYes
Bonus RequirementsLighting element, 2 B-rank+ lighting Ninjutsu
Canon or CustomCustom 


Last edited by Nobunaga on Sat Sep 09, 2017 4:51 pm; edited 9 times in total
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Sakana Meijin
Chuunin
Chuunin
avatar

Fame : 43
Home Village :
  • Cloud

Element(s) : Water
Clan : Meijin
Clan Element : Water
Bloodline : The Meijin "Disease"
Ryo : 13000
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 13, 2017 12:21 am

Hello Nobunga, I'll be looking at this.

First: Let's drop the short range to 50 meteres. 

Second: "instantaneously transport himself" since it's at RT or 70 speed I'd like that to be changed.

Third: We need to clarify the short range teleportation a bit, add a line about how you may only teleport to something you can physically see. Also, let's prevent you from teleporting on top of people by adding a line that you may only teleport within 2 meters of another person.

Fourth: For long range teleportation, please add that nobunga can only teleport to somewhere he has been before as per teleportation rules.

Fifth: Since this technique essentially shows how you have mastered the lighting element, let's add to the bonus requirements by saying "two B rank or higher lighting techniques."

That's all I have for you right now, please bump when finished and I'll take another look.


Stat Page

Quick Stats:

Health: 30 (+ 15)

Chakra: 100

Stamina: 50 (+ 49 AP)

Speed: 100 (+25)

Strength: 45
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Nobunaga
STORM
STORM
avatar

Fame : 7
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Lightning, Wind, Earth
Clan : Hiyu
Bloodline : Tai no Hengen
Ryo : 6750
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 13, 2017 5:00 pm

Made all the asked edits except for the third. I did add that I cannot transport into or onto a person, I was suppose to put that in originally but guess I forgot. However adding a 2 meters distance sort of defeats the purpose of the jutsu. Its meant to swiftly close the gap between him and his target, adding a 2 meter distance still leaves a gap between the two that he'd have to close to engage in hand to hand combat. I wrote that he cannot touch someone during the transportation but I guess to avoid issues of transporting myself within millimetres of someone, a distance is required. So could I have it reduced to 1 meter from the person?
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Sakana Meijin
Chuunin
Chuunin
avatar

Fame : 43
Home Village :
  • Cloud

Element(s) : Water
Clan : Meijin
Clan Element : Water
Bloodline : The Meijin "Disease"
Ryo : 13000
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 13, 2017 8:30 pm

I'm ok with you reducing it to 1 meter. 

I also have some more changes though.

1. Since long distance would take more energy, let's bump long range AP to 100. 

2. I'll give you two options for the next part:

A: If you want RT speed then cooldown will have to be 5 posts and wc requirement will be 8k

B: drop speed down to speed stat and you can make the cooldown 3 posts and make the wc 6k

3. Teleporting with people needs to be slower and have a requirement. I'm thinking 1 posts while in contact with a person before you're able to teleport people and teleportation with people happens at a speed of 50.

If you have any questions or concerns with any of that just let me know.


Stat Page

Quick Stats:

Health: 30 (+ 15)

Chakra: 100

Stamina: 50 (+ 49 AP)

Speed: 100 (+25)

Strength: 45
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Nobunaga
STORM
STORM
avatar

Fame : 7
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Lightning, Wind, Earth
Clan : Hiyu
Bloodline : Tai no Hengen
Ryo : 6750
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 20, 2017 4:49 pm

1- Made the change

2- Quite honestly I dont think either option is fair considering there are other similar jutsus out there that have exactly what I'm asking for. Some of them are teleportation jutsus, where the user can move at their RT and actually vanish and re-appear where as this jutsu im still there, just moving as a lightning bolt which technically means I can still be hit so thats already a disadvantage. So to increase my cooldown to 5 posts seems unfair to me. And the second option of having me just move at my own speed really isnt S ranked level at all.

3- Added in the new requirements.


Last edited by Nobunaga on Sun Aug 20, 2017 5:02 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Sakana Meijin
Chuunin
Chuunin
avatar

Fame : 43
Home Village :
  • Cloud

Element(s) : Water
Clan : Meijin
Clan Element : Water
Bloodline : The Meijin "Disease"
Ryo : 13000
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 20, 2017 5:01 pm

Let's compromise, keep the cooldown where it's at and up the wc to 8k.


Stat Page

Quick Stats:

Health: 30 (+ 15)

Chakra: 100

Stamina: 50 (+ 49 AP)

Speed: 100 (+25)

Strength: 45
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Nobunaga
STORM
STORM
avatar

Fame : 7
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Lightning, Wind, Earth
Clan : Hiyu
Bloodline : Tai no Hengen
Ryo : 6750
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 20, 2017 5:04 pm

Well I can actually learn this technique for free since I have a free S rank slot allotted to me so being honest, that wouldnt be much of a compromise on my part. What if along with the 8k words in case I ever teach it to someone I also increase the AP cost to maybe 60?
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Sakana Meijin
Chuunin
Chuunin
avatar

Fame : 43
Home Village :
  • Cloud

Element(s) : Water
Clan : Meijin
Clan Element : Water
Bloodline : The Meijin "Disease"
Ryo : 13000
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 20, 2017 5:44 pm

Sounds fair, edit that in and bump.


Stat Page

Quick Stats:

Health: 30 (+ 15)

Chakra: 100

Stamina: 50 (+ 49 AP)

Speed: 100 (+25)

Strength: 45
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View user profile
Nobunaga
STORM
STORM
avatar

Fame : 7
Home Village :
  • Sand

Element(s) : Lightning, Wind, Earth
Clan : Hiyu
Bloodline : Tai no Hengen
Ryo : 6750
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 20, 2017 10:40 pm

Done, also removed Tai no Hengen as a requirement since its not really relevant to the jutsu now that I think of it
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Sakana Meijin
Chuunin
Chuunin
avatar

Fame : 43
Home Village :
  • Cloud

Element(s) : Water
Clan : Meijin
Clan Element : Water
Bloodline : The Meijin "Disease"
Ryo : 13000
100%


PostSubject: Re: Bolt   Sun Aug 20, 2017 10:44 pm

Cool cool, trial approved.

A full mod will come by to look over this and full approve it.


Stat Page

Quick Stats:

Health: 30 (+ 15)

Chakra: 100

Stamina: 50 (+ 49 AP)

Speed: 100 (+25)

Strength: 45
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